The Very Best Way to Deal with Childhood Boredom
I'm not going to draw this out or make you wait for it. The best way to deal with childhood boredom is to be willing to let it happen and to trust it's positive outcomes. Some have even likened boredom to one of the best gifts we can give a child. It's the bridge between doing nothing and creativity. Creativity is what separates us from machines.
I understand that it can be uncomfortable and certainly annoying to listen to kids complain about having nothing to do. Years back I was a public high school math teacher. It was great training ground for becoming a parent. In a high school math classroom no one wants to do what they are supposed to do. Learning to deal with several dozen kids who are all trying in different ways to steer the group of course made handling five kids seem like a cake walk. One strategy I employed often was to use a quick, diffusing key phrase like "bummer".
But that's not fair!
>> Bummer
But I don't want to do that!
>> Bummer
But the last teacher didn't make us do it that way!
>> Bummer
I learned about this strategy through the Love and Logic books. It works well because it acknowledges the child while also communicating that nothing is changing. :)
When my kids complain about being bored I implore a few key phrases:
That's okay!
It's okay to be bored.
I know you'll figure something out.
Bummer.
And if none of those work I pull out the big guns:
Great! I have a bunch of laundry that needs sorted. I was hoping you didn't have anything to do.
That one always works :).
Bored kids can cause uncomfortable feelings. We might feel some intense pressure to provide entertainment and to do the brain work needed to figure out a solution. I believe that at some level these uncomfortable feelings are what drive us to over-enroll our kids and/or to hand them a screened device. I never understood the draw of the lengthy sports schedules until we did swim team with our kids one year. Honestly it was delightful to sit on the bleachers and watch our kids do something engaging while enjoying it all from the sidelines. But when adults dictate most of childhood, kids miss out on the joy of discovering something new to do all on their own. The benefits of learning to overcome boredom last well into adulthood.
When kids play outside it can take up to 45 minutes to determine a play scheme. Since kids activities are often less than 45 minutes we aren't used to giving kids the time they need to figure out what they are going to do with their surroundings. Waiting almost always gives way to something engaging.
So next time your kids complain about being bored, be okay with it! It is one of the grand parts of childhood!!
